It's because you think you need to be a bloodline of royalty or hijack some of Clio Stewart's DNA to own an orchid. Reality Check Really now...first of all, caring for an orchid is no big mystery. Putting one foot in front of the other, pretending you didn't see or hear them.

Possibly you even heard them whisper... It's like complaining about a shortage of good men, when in reality you're tripping over. Even though you want one soooo bad, or maybe two, or five so you can proudly display them on your desk declaring them off limits saying, "Don't touch!" in your best rodrick mom voice as people reach out to caress a petal.

With over 20,000 different orchid species and 100,000 hybrids of course there is one just for you. Have you ever been in a garden nursery, walked by a row of lovely orchids and noticed they were all staring at you. You don't need to be a certified horticulturist to care for orchids, and most importantly orchids don't talk to each other...so quit being so paranoid. I certainly thought that for a long time.

Amateur...You couldn't handle this.